Beautiful Mess

Why I love photography-- and no I do not mean an instagrammed picture of your food, a selfie that makes your tits look good, or your dolled up duck face--I mean real photography.. I don't mean to say every photo we take needs to involve tripods, shutter speeds, ghosting, or other photographic techniques--but I mean photos with intention--with depth. 

I mean photos that jump off the page or maybe it would be more accurate to say photos that jump of the screen at this point. Photos should evoke emotion. They should transport you to that moment frozen in time. 

When I take photos--they are for me. I snap a shot when I am in a place or a moment and I think to myself--"if this isn't nice what is?" (kudos to Kurt Vonnegut to this way of thinking or phrase) I take photos when I want to freeze that emotion--that experience. I want to freeze that moment and bring it with me wherever I go. I want to add it to my archive of life and allow it to live inside of me. I want to grow from that moment, allow it to become a part of me as I do with each experience, each person that crosses my path.

Of course if someone can benefit from looking at that photo, if they can imagine that moment, that experience and it brings them happiness-- well that's beautiful.

So often I am surrounded by people, chaos, moving parts, impending to- do lists, I forget to give myself space. Photography allows us to pause. To reside in space; silence--it is in that space that we often find who we are-- in those quiet moments. What comes into your mind when you allow for silence?

Well today I sat, I drove, I chatted and laughed with a good friend, I felt the ocean breeze-- its' slightly thicker texture as it carried the ocean spray sporadically onto my skin, I felt the cramping of my hand as I transcribed these thoughts- the old fashioned way. Heart drifting all the way out my hand--pen to paper, across the page in a beautifully raw and messy scrawl. 

It is days like this where I believe I am truly present with my life-- no sense escaped me. No sight went unnoticed, no feeling passed me by. It does not mean that it is all pleasant or that these days can only happen when we are at our best. In fact usually these days happen when we are in our worst moments. Mindfulness and reflection forces its' way in like a storm. It floods our senses and ignites something within us that brings us to the now. 

So today I sit. I sit with myself and I smile. I truly love this beautiful mess that is me.